When I started this blog, the purpose was to focus more on advertising, communications, etc. Somehow I find myself thinking more and more about life and the situations some people get themselves into.
One thing I have been told is I have a unique way of looking at various situations so please allow me to comment on the latest fashion trend called ‘children’. Call me old-fashioned but I was of the understanding that sex is an expression of love between two people and a child is a product of that love. It seems like these days there is a lot of ‘love’ going around with a lot of different persons
Don’t get me wrong, every person has their story, but some stories I find hard to understand. A friend of mine was telling me about a gentleman who has nine children with seven women. This, is one of the stories I cannot understand…I mean it raises so many questions: Woman number 1 & 2 are somewhat excused, but 3 though 7? Did they know? Did they think they could have changed him? When I do hear the full story, number 2 was not so innocent….apparently she and number one were friends and would come over to babysit her children (whom she had with the gentleman) only to make three children with him and, to make matters worse, was shocked to learn that he was with number 3 while they were together.
I am just amazed, I truly am. There is a young lady i grew up with, she had one child and unfortunately the child’s father passed, she picked up another guy, had a child with him even though he said he was not interested in marriage. Picked up a third guy, who she became pregnant for, then he left then she made a fourth. So that is four children, by four men all before she turned 33. Mind you now all of them have different last names. I cannot image the logic that goes into the decisions some people make.
Don’t get me wrong, I am not judging, I am trying to understand. As I said before, everyone has their story. I have one child that I made for my boyfriend who would eventually become my husband then my ex husband a few years later. There are people out there who, I am sure. would not understand my situation. For me I think it is, how do people not learn? Having three children with three different persons? Thats three little personalities to shape, three attitudes to deal with and, furthermore, it takes more than money to raise a child, you need time, patience, understanding and a desire to want them to aspire to a level even higher than yours. Children also tend to slow you down. They are great but pretty soon that course you wanted to do, you can’t anymore or that job you wanted to take, you can’t take the chance right now and pretty soon, 10 years have passed. This is sad but true, especially for women and even more so for women who do not have a support system.
You make all these children with all these different people and the family of one child may not necessarily be the family of another and you have to now explain all of this to them when they get older cause above all, they are very inquisitive. Failure to provide proper explanation can leave children open to all types of situations. It’s true what they say about the sins of the parents falling on the children. I have heard of close encounters of half brothers ending up with half sisters or even cousins hooking up, unknowingly of course.
I think we need go back to the days where children were regarded as miracles and not just ‘something expected to have’. When a child would represent the union of two people, the product of all that is good and positive, the best of both human beings and not a product of a lust filled infatuation or the end result of a drunken binge. Children are not accessories, they are human beings and they grow up. What we would like is for them to grow up to be well-adjusted adults. It is our duty as parents to ensure that they do, we are responsible for what we unleash into society. It is never too late to learn from your mistakes. I spoke with someone the other day, i did not know her but as God would have it, I was exactly who she needed to speak with at the point in time. She was 31 years old with 8 children and I explained to her, that absolutely no one is to make her feel less than a human being. Unfortunately she was a walking stereotype, but once there is life there is hope and she can turn her life around. She felt motivated and hopefully she took my advice. I hope my readers take my advice too. This is not something that is age specific this is something that needs to be modified and mindsets to be changed, and, it needs be changed soon. Our future as a nation depends on it